Jul 10 2008
Forgetting That You’re Asian
Quite a while ago, I was sharing a discussion with an acquaintance and she brought up the fact that sometimes, when she’s with her non-Asian friends, she actually forgets that she’s Asian. And, at that point, she even seemed to have a hint of pride in saying that. So this got me thinking—how in the world could any Asian forget that they’re Asian?
Now, growing up with most of my friends being Asian (well, this fluctuated at points) and being made fun of every now and then for being Asian, it’s pretty hard for me to forget my race. But even when I hang out with my non-Asian friends (especially with friends from college), forgetting my own race is still something unfathomable.
In some ways, it did make me a little upset when that acquaintance of mine mentioned that (especially since she knew how to speak Chinese fluently and knew a lot more about the Chinese culture than I did). It felt like, in many ways, a betrayal even though, in comparison to many Asians, I’m as white as they can get.
Yes, I’m proud to be an American. And, yes, I’m not too fond of some of the things that Chinese have the habit of doing. But forgetting my race and who I am in the mirror is something that I find a bit repulsive.
This issue, alone, is a very weighted one and I know that this entry merely scratches the surface of it. And because of that, for the sake of time and space, I’ll just leave it at that. But I would like to hear from all you fellow Asians out there—what’s your view about forgetting your own “Asian-hood”?
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2 Responses to “Forgetting That You’re Asian”
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I once heard about someone saying “I don’t look that Asian, do I?” to which her sister just gave her a WTF face. Grrr.
http://waxingpoetically.today.com
This type of thing–forgetting that you’re Asian–happens quite a lot as you get older. That or you start to notice it more, or maybe it happens more as we get older because some Asians may fully recognize “race value” as it stands today in America (unspoken understanding among many).
I understand what you talk about as I have met many Asians that rather refer to themselves as being “whitewashed,” like they are actually proud of that. Or sometimes, you’ll hear others (I realize I’ve said it too) say things like, “She looks so Asian though.” Like I think about it now, and really what does that even mean? Yes, she is Asian. That’s why she looks it, but it seems that somehow a lot of Asian Americans have some kind of understanding that it is “better” to be less Asian and supposedly best to be more Americanized or “whitewashed.”
I could say much more but I don’t want to write a whole blog in your comments. haha. Anyways, good topic and I’m glad you brought this issue up.